When you’re working with a team or with people in general, it’s common to feel that you should at least try to please most of them, if not all of them. The idea of saying “NO” to your colleagues seems forbidden even though it’s important to know when to say no to people around us. If you’re someone who goes the extra mile for others just to get their trust and/or companionship at work, this article is for you.
Picture this: you are a blank slate, in a new workplace, with a new job. What better way to ensure that you are on the right track than knowing and befriending everyone? Obviously you want to avoid working with colleagues who don’t seem to like you. While it is absolutely normal to want to be liked, but understand that it isn’t necessary to be liked by everyone.
For some, it may be quite easy to get along with people. But the thing is, you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s completely okay! Instead of being upset about it, it’s better to tune into the other side of the coin and try your best not to think that you’re losing on this.
Here are the 5 reasons why it’s okay to not please everyone in the office.
1. You cannot be a 10/10 to and for all people
This is a very important thought that you should keep reminding yourself of. It’s never about you when you aren’t everyone’s cup of tea. We all are unique individuals with different backgrounds and personalities, hence It’s totally normal to have your personality clashes with some people. The idea of pleasing everyone in your workplace is simply not feasible.
Ultimately, work is work and you should never take things too personally. Plus, it isn’t a must to have relationships with your colleagues beyond that. It would definitely be a plus point if you can enjoy nights out in the metro with your colleagues after work, but don’t be disheartened if that doesn’t pan out. Instead, focus on getting your work done and work hard to achieve your career goals. You can still be the top performer in the company without being the most popular person in the office.
2. You can build confidence out of it
They say “no man is an island” but you can and should be the island. This helps to build the idea of being independent and self-reliant. You should believe that you can wing things out on your own, without having to overly rely on other people all the time.
The key to this is putting the arrow in reverse. Since there is nothing you can do about people not liking you, you should focus more on ways to improve yourself such as taking up relevant online courses, take initiative to take on more tasks, and offer to help others when necessary. Slowly but surely, people around you would notice the extra initiatives you took to be a better team player and recognize you as a valuable asset in the company.
With the consistent effort to show your capabilities, your will slowly build up your confidence at the workplace. However, it’s crucial to learn how to reflect on yourself and be able to take on criticism at work.
3. You get to focus more on yourself
Some might consider the act of focusing on ourselves is selfish and self-centered. We beg to differ because as long as it helps to speed up your personal and career growth, there is nothing wrong with placing your own goals before others. In fact, we all should have sufficient space for career growth in order to reach our full potential at our jobs.
The action of prioritizing your own needs not only has positive impact in your career, but also helps to improve your overall well-being which should always comes first before anything else. There is no need to be a workaholic just to chase for wealth mindlessly as money can’t buy long term happiness.
4. You don’t have to be just like the rest
Many of us are guilty of being the perfectionists at work which might cause us to burnout at work. We often forget that we are flawed and it’s okay to make mistake. Even though it would be great to be Mr. or Miss Popular in the office, but no matter how “perfect” you try to be, there will always be people who judge you. It could be the colour of your shirt or the idea you suggested during the meeting earlier, there is no way we can please everyone even if we try to do everything right. Hence, instead of focusing on ways to please people, be comfortable with who you are and knowing that flaws are just rooms for improvement which you should make use of.
It’s absolutely normal to be imperfect but that doesn’t mean you should stop trying to be better than who you were yesterday.
5. Things are a lot easier not minding it
Sometimes, life is easier when you stop being too harsh on yourself. It doesn’t mean that you’re letting yourself go or stop trying to improve, it should only applies to situations that are beyond your control for example you just can’t seem to get along with one particular colleague at work. Instead of feeling bad about yourself, you should take it easy and remind yourself that there are other people who genuinely like who you are and care about you.
It’s common to have issues and office politics in the workplace regardless of the industry you are in. However, it doesn’t mean we have to go for the extra miles to please everyone in the workplace. We should always remind ourselves that every employee in the company, including you deserve to be respected and treated fairly. Hence, it’s perfectly fine not give too much thoughts about being the most likable person in the office.
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